Hello, my dear readers and friends. I’m guessing you are wondering where this wayward little slave has gone? I do know some of you have sent me PM’s inquiring if I was still alive? Still a slave? or what. Thank you for them all. It’s nice to know you are loved and you are missed. That feeling can also be a little intimidating. Being a simple slave trying to be the best slave she can, to know others read and care about you in this Internet can send a few chills down the spine sometimes if I stop and think about it.
He Proves Who is the Master
For reasons I really don’t want to talk about or to recall, I had upset my Owner and His lover, The Pretty Brunette and as always, my Owner made sure the punishment was swift and immediate. Its one of the things I do love about Him is that He always knows He must keep the leash short and stiff.
In previous relationships, my Master would often want to stop and talk about what may have made Him want to punish me. They want to make sure I know and understand that it is a punishment and not anger or whatever. Other Master’s I have had will also allow me time to defend myself and maybe even ask forgiveness that would include no punishment. In other words, they will let me escape a punishment they feel may not really be needed.
I always hated that. Tell me where I failed in my service to you, punish me properly then talk about what will change in the future… Not make me wait and let me escape it because you feel sorry for me and maybe I really didn’t mean it. I am your slave, I am yours to punish if I deserve it. As long as I know why and how and we do get to discuss it.
Master-Sir also will let me know its not out of anger and if it is anger, He will wait until that feeling goes away, then deal with the problem and give His slave her punishment. But it’s never very long to wait and I know why immediately.
Rebel or React?
This is not to make excuses for my actions or my behavior. However, between the fact that my Owner asked everyone to not fuck His slave’s pussy. Adding to the verbal humiliation each time this was announced or requested. Having to be used for all other things while being told what was off limits was making me hornier than I ever was. The new “project” had made it easier for me to slip out of my long-held role as His slave and do things, say things and react to life situations that were not normal for a real slave and were more normal for a free woman, a vanilla lady.
To say I enjoyed behaving in this new manner would be a lie. I felt like I was a tweleve-year-old sneaking some candy from the candy store while daddy looked the other way. it was not me but seemed like I was doing things that my old self would do and I was just watching from another place. I knew it was wrong when I was doing them but I felt a little fun at the moment. Afterward, I felt absolutely awful and was glad when Master-Sir punished me without comment or discussion.
It’s like i tried to live another life for a few minutes to taste what I thought maybe i was missing. But i wasn’t. it was retaliating? rebelling against my self? My life??
This is still MY blog. I can talk about what I want here without fear of punishment. But this is a topic I do not want to talk about at this time even with His permission, I still just want to get this out there to explain why I was missing in action. I am still here, still working on my project with great success and can’t wait to share with you all the updates as well as usually things i have going on in my slave life. I have been properly punished with a beating that i still remember and can fell each time i sit down. as well as other restrictions in my life including no Internet for any reason. And he means Any reason!! i have promised my Owner that I will not wander again and that i do agree 1000% that it was needed. I think the acting out was needed as much as the resulting punishment. Maybe in a way, I wanted to see just exactly where He would finally draw the line. Silly me, He drew the line quickly and showed what happens when it is violated just as quickly!
I never rebelled against my parents. Probably because I knew there was never any real punishment except a lecture followed by a ton of questions. I know i am loved and well taken care of here as a slave, His slave. Its been a long time since I have not been Owned and I know now that I never want to feel that way again or have any need to sample that horrible life again. I am where I belong. Owned, loved, protected and properly punished when I need to be.
Thank You for being here and being my friend…
Now back to the regularly scheduled program !!